HELLO! I UPDATED THIS!
Hello my name is Katie. I am also known as duckie, go away you dork, and Flunky Potty Pants. I have a dog named Kandy. She tends to look at me funny a lot. I have a hamster too. His name is Romeo. He's cool. I had a hamster named Peanut. He was a boy hamser. He looked like a peanut. He killed himself. He was cool. I have a dork brother too. His name is Brian. He's a perverted psycho killer. My mom is too overprotective and my dad is just really confused. I like duckies. they are cool. I babysit a lot and I get lots of money (Cha ching!) that was mighty gay, just like Mr.Boyle and his gay self. Mr.Boyle is gay. So is Mr.Smith. Ans Mr.Gerstenburger. And Mrs.Whyte. And Mrs Hennon . . . The list goes on. And on and on and on. It just keeps going and going and going. Like that big happy Energizer bunny . . . That was cool. . Okay,back to me. My Friends? Michaela, Diana, Brittany, Brooke, Lisa, MIchelle, Jenni, Ashley, Kim, Patty, Kim, Amanda, Sana, Kyle and all my little friends, and. . . that's it! Well actually, there's also George (he rides my bus), Stan (he drove our bus in DC),and this cool old guy at wall mart. He gave me two stickers. His name is Louis. Oh yeah you're probably wondering how I got the name Flunky Potty Pants . . .
Use the first letter of your first name to determine your NEW first name:
a = stinky
b = lumpy
c = buttercup
d = gidget
e = crusty
f = greasy
g = fluffy
h = cheeseball
i = chim-chim
j = poopsie
k = flunky
l = booger
m = pinky
n = zippy
o = goober
p = doofus
q = slimy
r = loopy
s = snotty
t = falafel
u = dorkey
v = squeezit
w = oprah
x = skipper
y = dinky
z = zsa-zsa
Use the first letter of your last name to determine the first half of your NEW last name:
a = diaper
b = toilet
c = giggle
d = bubble
e = girdle
f = barf
g = lizard
h = waffle
i = cootie
j = monkey
k = potty
l = liver
m = banana
n = rhino
o = burger
p = hamster
q = toad
r = gizzard
s = pizza
t = gerbil
u = chicken
v = pickle
w = chuckle
y = gorilla
z = stinker
Use the last letter of your last name to determine the second half of your NEW last name:
a = head
b = mouth
c = face
d = nose
e = tush
f = breath
g = pants
h = shorts
i = lips
j = honker
k = butt
l = brain
m = tushie
n = chunks
o = hiney
p = biscuits
q = toes
r = buns
s = fanny
t = sniffer
u = sprinkles
v = kisser
w = squirt
y = brains
z = juice
I like tellitubbies! They’re all funny and stuff. So is pokemon. And so is hello Kitty and Keropi! They're all my friends too. So is Maggie (Jenni's cat) Maggie is cool. Here are some great and special things:
26 THINGS TO DO ON AN ELEVATOR
1.) When there's only one other person in the
elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
2.) Push the buttons and pretend they give you a
shock. Smile, and go back for more.
3.) Ask if you can push the button for other people,
but push the wrong ones.
4.) Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone,
and d ask if they know what floor you're on.
5.) Hold the doors open, and say that you're waiting
for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say, "Hi Greg, how's your day been??"
6.) Drop a pen, and wait until someone reaches to
help pick it up, and then scream, "That's mine!!"
7.) Bring a camera, and take pictures of everyone in
8.) Move you desk into the elevator, and whenever
someone gets on, ask if they have an appointment.
9.) Lay down a Twister mat and ask people if they'd
like to play.
10.) Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask if they hear something ticking.
11.) Pretend you are a flight attendant and review
Emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
12.) Ask, "Did you feel that??"
13.) Stand really close to someone, sniffing them
14.) When the doors close, announce to the others,
"It's okay. Don't panic, they'll open up again."
15.) Swat at flies that don't exist.
16.) Tell people that you can see their aura.
17.) Call out. "GROUP HUG!!" then enforce it.
18.) Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead
and muttering, "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!!"
19.) Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while
peering inside, ask, Got enough air in there??"
20.) Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
21.) Stare at another passenger for a while, then
announce in horror, You're one of THEM", and back away slowly.
22.) Wear a puppet on your hand, and use it to talk
to the other passengers.
23.) Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
24.) Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
25.) Stare grinning at another passenger for a
while, and then announce, I have new socks on."
26.) Draw a little square on the floor with chalk,
and announce to the other passengers, "This is MY personal space!!"
It's all because of prunes
Use this toothpaste!
In order to avoid a head on collision, Jim ran into a tellephone pole
It happened to Jane, it could happen to you, don't be next
I wanna pooch with rainbow hair that grows down to the floor
Aaah! I wasted a donut!
Every day, cake and tea, just my pokemon and me
Soft and squishy like mashed potatoes
Leasure time! Leasure time warehouse!
More Ovaltine please!
Hi yi! you is up on a stump ain't ya?
Savannah! you git yer lil butt on over here or im gonna whoop it!
A funny thing happens when you drink Welches grape juice! It makes your lips smack!
I used to make those out of potatoes!
"Eat it with your spoon-flavored tongue"--Me
"Catholic clergy molests boys worldwide"--some protester's sign
"Did you see my penis monument?"--Bryan
"I'll give him $10 if he stays somewhere else all night"--Jenni
"I've got wedgie... can I have your scissors?"--Kim
"Are you full of beans, Jenni?"--Me
"Mine's nice and soft"--Sam
"PP Boy"--some sign
"Next time you throw something at me I'm gonna make you eat it"--Jim
"Are you wearing my socks?"--Me
"Give me back my underwear!"--Jenni
"Uranus is full of gas"--Bryan
"I dare you to rub his head... his cranium you sicko!"--Me
"It's too short! We need more monkeys!"--soldier guy
"Patty's our daddy and Justin's our mommy"--Jenni
"I've been in the Washington Monument"--Jenni
"Has the Washington Monument been in you?"--Me
"Dude, there's something all hard here"--Jenni
"Must be Bryan"--Kim
I had a wet dream last night . . .
It took me three cans of spray n wash to get it out . . .
I like roast beef sandwiches. They're yummy . . .
I hate the poppyseeds on the buns . . .
Other cool stuff:
~ Col, you better take a look at this radar. What is it? I dunno, sir, but it looks like a giant . . .
~ Dick! Take a look out the starboard! It looks like a huge . . .
~ Pecker! Ooh where? Wait! That’s not a woodpecker! It looks like someone’s . . .
~ Privates! We have reports of an Unidentified Flying object. It is a long, smooth shaft complete with . . .
~ Two balls! What is that? Looks like an enormous flying . . .
~ Willie! What’s that? Well, it looks like a giant . . .